The Monkey-Bird 

Species: monkeybusiness birdious

Habitat: Suburbs, backyards,

Traits:  

• Strong desire to climb

• Clever use of  tools and opposable thumbs

• Engages frequently in monkey business

• Enjoying picking things off floor, other monkeys, and furniture and ingesting them or forcing them into the mouths of mother monkeys

• Hangs on to mother monkey with both arms and legs

• Uses feet to pick up toys and pick fuzzies off carpet

• Likes to fling things, so far not poo

• Communicates through series of grunts and indiscernible exclamations

• Uses primate sign language

• Capable sharp-nailed monkey fingers

• Prone to beating chest & growling as signs of aggression

• Enjoys splashing in the bird bath

• Constant chirping of “da-da” and/or “ma-ma”

• Enjoys nesting, nest building materials usually included blankets and pillows from couch, stuffed animals, Thomas-the-Train chair, assorted toys and whatever can be found under couch.

• Attempting to feed baby bird style while mama bird chews her food

• Sharp beak

• Preening for the ladies

• Exhibits cockiness and believes himself to be ruler of the roost

• Dislikes being caged

• Seeks out various means of flying

A very good specimen has taken up residence in my house.  I managed to snap a picture.