Some days motherhood sucks. 

Why doesn’t anyone ever say that?  They should have a chapter in every baby book titled “parenting can suck too”.  When you bring that sweet new baby home you never think that you’ll be horribly embarrassed when he chucks his sippy cup clear across the restaurant at lunch, that you’ll have to wrestle him to get him into a diaper while he kicks and screams like you’re killing him, or that you’ll want to put him in a box and ship him to Grandma when he won’t go down for a nap.  

When you’re a stay at home mom you’re supposed to have it all together right:  a list of educational activities for the day, healthy home cooked meals, and kids who behave perfectly.  WRONG!  Being a stay at home mom is emotionally draining, and emotional drain and stress kill your energy and put your body and health in a funk.

It was on one of these sucky days last week that I picked up the book “Mom’s Need Time Outs Too”.  I spent the last week reading it (during that huge amount of free time I have) and frankly….i want my free time back.  That $12 book is now in the trash. 

Aside from being a dry read overall, I found the book to be a stale reworking on every other stupid how to be a better mom book out there.  Despite a long preface about how the three authors talked to real moms and came up with real solutions, I heard that old familiar tune…take time for yourself…oh yes, but exercise and cook healthy meals and do this and do that.

Seriously, I don’t need a book adding to my to do list.  Not that I’m a parenting pro, but here is some real world mom advice: it’s okay to let your kid eat a corn dog for dinner and run around in his pajama shirt and no pants all day while you veg out with Oprah and as PW says pick your toes. 

It’s okay to leave your kid with a dippy teenager girl (aren’t they all these days) for 3 hours every week so you can go out with the hubby.  Sure she’s not going to do your kids’ IQ any good but as long as he’s whole when you get home it’s all good!

There are days when it sucks to be a mom, there are days when it sucks twice as much because you’re a stay at home mom.  When you fight losing battles all day so you start a fight with your husband just so you can win something…it’s okay.   Once you’ve really pissed him off with an argument about what movies Bob Sagat was in, open up and clue him into what’s really going on.  Don’t hide behind a smile because it only breeds resentment. 

Call a girlfriend or email your sister and say my kid is driving me nuts today.   Your emotions get cabin fever too, let them out to run around.   Let go of the pereception that we all have to wear a brave face and be everyone’s everything. 

Let it all hang out and then start the next day new.  So what if junior went to bed with a fruit snack stuck to the bottom of his foot and mysterious pen marks on his leg….he’s fine and you will be too.  Being a mom is the job that never ends…if you need to, borrow a mantra from Dory “just keep swimming.”